True Confessions

I shy away from calling myself an artist.

I'm one of those photographers who really don't shoot person work.  I photograph my kids, but really, not very often.  When I hear people talk about the importance of person projects, all I can think of is how expensive that would be for a film photographer, and "who has time for that?!"

I have a business mind.  

For me, my camera is my job, and while I TOTALLY love my job, I don't necessarily want to do when I'm on my own time.

I've told friends this before, other photographers.  And they usually look at me like I'm a crazy person.  But there you have it, my true confession.

Something has happened lately however, that has me a little vexed.  

More and more, I find myself thinking about still-lifes, Dutch master style, with gorgeous light, or flowers and coffee cups, that sort of thing.

I've kept this little obsession to myself for about a year, feeling like it's a little silly.  All the while, quietly photographing my latte, a pine cone and a perfectly placed spoon with my iPhone.  And now, it's progressed to the point of actually shooting film.  

I even went out and picked a bouquet of dandelions poofs. Do you know how hard it is to walk with a bouquet of dandelion poofs?!  The answer is, very.  It took me a long time.  But I did it.  And it made me happy.

Could this be the pull of personal work?  Of creating for the sake of just creating?  Of having a little fun?

Maybe so.

But what ever it is, I think I'm going to keep it up.  I'm realizing that it doesn't have to mean anything.  It doesn't have to be profound, and bring in a million dollars.  It doesn't even have to be good.  It's just fun.  And having some fun can't be bad.   Right?  

I get it now. 

Oh, and here is a photo of my dandelion poofs.  :)

Sandra Coan, Dandelions on Film, Little Bellows